It was Brett Davis' new year's resolution, and he promised himself and his loved ones that he'd do it. Let's help the poor guy.
November 21, 2009
November 20, 2009
Reason #73 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis FAST. Jeff Goldblum STRONG.
November 19, 2009
Reason #72 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Needs Somebody To Hold A Tissue In Place To Stop The Nosebleed, So Brett Davis Can Finish The Drum Solo.
November 18, 2009
Reason #71 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Thinks This Audio Museum Tour Would Be Even Better With Jeff Goldblum Narrating The Piet Mondrian Exhibit. (It's Just Blocks!?)
November 17, 2009
Reason #70 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Misses His Long Lost Love Elanor. Jeff Goldblum Is An Actor, Right? He Can Portray Elanor! An Actor Can Do It! An...An Actor...(weeping)...An Actor Can Do It.
November 16, 2009
Reason #69 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Needs A Decent Tenor If This Barbershop Quartet Is Going To Get Off The Ground, And We All Know Phil Isn't Pulling His Fucking Weight Anymore.
November 15, 2009
Reason #68 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Wants To Go Ice Fishing But He's Afraid He'll Fall In The Whole. Wait, Is Ice Fishing Real, Or Is It Just Something People Do In Sitcoms? WTF I'm Sooooo Confused.
November 14, 2009
Reason #67 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Made A Mistake, And Flew All The Way To Europe To Meet Some Swedish Nobody Named Jiff Gjöurdblorm.
November 13, 2009
Reason #66 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because YOU Convinced Brett Davis That If You Turn Off The Lights, Spin Around Ten Times While Repeating "Bloody Goldblum" Then Look Into A Mirror, Jeff Goldblum Will Appear. Brett Davis Did This For Six Hours And Got Sick, And Now YOU Feel Bad. For Shame.
November 12, 2009
Reason #65 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Wants To Take A Picture Of The Real Jeff Goldblum Next To The Wax Statue Of Jeff Goldblum That Brett Has Been Working On Since April '04.
November 11, 2009
Reason #64 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Sixteen In The Clip And One In The Hole, Brett Davis Is About To Make Some Bodies Turn Cold, Now They Droppin' and Yellin' It's A Tad Bit Late, Brett Davis & Jeff G Had To Regulate. I Laid All Them Busters Down And Let My Gat Explode, Now I'm Switching My Mind Back Into "Freak Mode," If You Want Skirts, Sit Back And Observe, I Just Left A Gang Of Those Over There On The Curb. (I'll admit, that one was better in concept than execution.)
November 10, 2009
Reason #63 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Needs A Tall Guy Like Jeff Goldblum To Reach That Thing On The Top Shelf, And Why Not Just Get Jeff Goldblum To Do It?
November 9, 2009
Reason #62 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Has A Photo Album With "Brett & Jeff's European Vacation" Written On It (In Gold Marker, Mind You) Already.
November 8, 2009
Reason #61 (To Help Brett Davis Meet Jeff Goldblum): Because Brett Davis Needs A Secretary That Doesn't TAKE PERSONAL CALLS WHEN SHE SHOULD BE PICKING UP MY FUCKING DRY CLEANING. (jeff, don't put this part in, but make sure that the last few words are emphasized. thanks for picking up my dry cleaning. :) -brett)
November 7, 2009
